I have talked a little about dating here in my blog........not being ready till very recently.....this past year was about healing myself, and discovering me, and finding out where I am headed and what I want.....I wasn't interested in having it muddied by the rest.......I have been fortunate this past year to have a male friend that I will be forever grateful for.....supporting me....cheering me on.....and being there for me each step.....that was also such a gift......such a strong and safe male presence.......but now I feel I am ready to explore the dating part of my post divorce journey;-) I have been on dating sites for a bit......mostly a spectator.....scrolling and being highly entertained;-).....there have been very few times I have wanted to hit the like button or message back to the messages I have received.......However on Sunday a sort of random set of circumstances happened that put me in the position, to hit like and get matched to somebody that had liked my profile also, and get a message from him that compelled me to answer.......it has now developed into a pretty easy, natural, and fun conversation that makes me feel that I may let him take me on a date in real life:). LOL Kinda crazy to think of.......there really is such a part of me that is old fashioned with all of that stuff......I am not casual about men and dating and have never been.....always forging connections and moving forward in that space.......but I feel that there is no harm now in my life in exploring some of what the world has to offer........have some coffee dates.......have some dinner......grab a hike and then see where it goes from there.....it is interesting, as I have mentioned before to be in your 40s in this spot.......because you are SO CLEAR about what you want.........SO CLEAR on what you will now tolerate from a relationship and where your standards lie......but keenly aware that nobody is perfect and life happens to us all, and that you need to remain open to the experience......not closing it off because of the other circumstances......and that is what I am trying to do......just to remain open......and proceed forward in chatting with this guy and follow through on the coffee date part :-) and then I can check another piece of this off my list of what happens in the aftermath of all of it.......I am always fascinated to meet a new person, especially one that has traveled a similar path.....hear their war story......understand their perspective....the wisdom gleaned for them in the aftermath too.......and it feels like the right time to be branching out into this new part of my life......seeing what is out there......finding my way......and I know if I just remain me in all of it, then I will be OK......remaining true to who I am......and what I want in this life........not compromising myself or changing me.......understanding that the right person will get me and want me for me......I trust that.....and I also know what I want to do better this time around too! Adventure awaits! :)
jperuso
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