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jperuso

Will I get it right?

I talked about my chart and what things it reveals about me.....and love and relationships are a theme that occurs all over my chart.....I have some beautiful planetary influence there.....speaking to my ability and inclination to love deeply.....that love is an ever present theme within me.....and around me........but it is also sorta one of my karmic lessons and work in this life.....showing the challenges I have had in that area of my life.....matters of the heart.......and for some their chart will not show that.....they will get married once, love of their life.....little old people, done deal......or she shared that some people's chart shows solitude and being isolated from anybody.....or at least from a life partner.....and for me and where things lie in my chart, it is indicative of perhaps my finding love........finally in my life......and figuring it out......in this life.....that it is a part of my future path.......I suppose only time will tell......and there is a school of thought that she and I discussed, saying that our souls decided before we entered this life what we will be challenged with or what we agree to have on our soul's journey......and with who......so my ex and I, our soul selves......decided to enter into this "soul pact" if you will......and play out what has happened for our evolution and our soul's greater good.....or our soul's path......and that is interesting for me to think about.....that I agreed, "soul Jenn", to what has befallen me in this life.....knowing what would happen beforehand........knowing the treasures I suppose found on the other side.....and I always wrestle with this notion, and knowing in my heart what is meant to be is.....because I do believe that........but I wrestle that alongside free will.......I also believe we possess free will........I really do.......and perhaps it triggers alternate endings and stories for us????.....propelling us in other directions and places......like choose your own adventure books;-).....gosh I used to love reading those........I sometimes feel there was a crossroads in my situation, at the end of my marriage, that I believe he had a choice, and could have chosen another story, but instead triggered the one we are living......which feels very much meant to be to me in my day to day, and like a divine intervention......and maybe I would feel the same in that other story too????? I will never know.....and it is hard to say.....so after speaking to her I would like to believe that I will get love right.......like REALLY right.......in this lifetime.....not luke warm, half assed love lol:) Or love wrought with some big challenges and complications.....but the REAL thing.......finally.......and while that is a deliciously fun thought, it is all OK......it really is......I am content to remain open to what comes.....what goes.....and what has the potential to be......each and every step!

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