What we leave behind......

Yesterday was rough......we met in her old room in the morning.....Had coffee and donuts, cried. laughed, and reminisced.....and it made me think again, about what we leave behind.....and about the way we live our lives.....and what is important, and what isn't.......and so much of it comes down to what we leave behind in the hearts and minds of our family and friends......our legacy....and it is something we should all be mindful of I suppose while we are living, and got life ahead of us....what energy, and what about us do we want to be remembered for once we are gone....and perhaps share with our loved ones how we feel about them while they are here......and my friend left behind a positive legacy.....no question......was she perfect....... no......... are any of us? Definitely not......but the way in which she lived her life, the intention of it, the joy of living she possessed and shared with others, leaves an impression in her absence.....and we have a responsibility some to that.....not so people have nice things to say after we die.....but so that we leave an impression in this world....both while we live and after we are gone......believing that our purpose is to make a difference......she believed that wholeheartedly.....took her teaching role seriously in that sense.....wanting to impact her students in positive ways.....one of her former students shared such a sweet post about her last night to that end.....and it is all so hard to comprehend still......how something so awful and tragic could have befallen her..... HER.......it is just not an ending that makes any sense to her story.....as if you are reading a book and predict what will happen in the final chapter, and then it shocks you beyond words....and again I can relate to that part too.....on a much smaller scale.... I felt the same about the end of my marriage, the end of that story for me......and I know people expressed their shock too.....and life can certainly be shocking......delivering its shock to us when we least expect it......never knowing when it will arrive.....and I believe we should be living our lives that way......treasuring the moments that are right there....the ones we are living in......the ones that find our day to day.......and maybe ask ourselves some if we are making the difference we want to in the world.....the impression we give in our day to day and leave as we live our lives......it matters......Debbie left an impression with us all.....her Bushkill family.....she loved her job.....said it every year all the way to the end......she loved jeans days and staff breakfasts....being on the Sunshine committee and doing nice things for staff members and others......she loved the field trip to the Bog.....baking brownies for every occasion, and bringing a good cheeseball to the party......she loved to travel, and lay in the sun......and when I think of her face I remember it smiling way more than not......and laughing.....she liked to have fun and laugh......she had a hearty laugh......and we all laughed a lot......she loved her boys so fiercely, so proud of their many accomplishments....loved being a mother.....and then becoming a grandmother....perhaps her favorite role in this life.....so much pride and love shone through.....and those impressions, just the tip of the iceberg....but you get the idea.....so I guess I write this today to just remind us all that the tiny moments....in the day to day matter......they really do.....not so people can tell good stories about us over coffee and donuts....but so that we can truly touch lives and make a difference each and every day.....it all matters......it really does.......