A simple idea with huge implications......especially when love is involved. As parents I think that that is a huge challenge for many of us. You want only the best for your kids. You have lived life and have wisdom under your belt, yet your kids have a strong desire to find their own wisdom, their own journey...... As they grow and start to fly the nest I can imagine how hard it will be to let go, to let them do their thing, to follow their hearts, to knock on the doors meant for them, or not meant for them depending......to just let them be, and to travel their road. I think the situation I am in is kind of similar in that it has become shockingly obvious that my journey is not the same as my husbands.....not even close...... and boy that is a big one.....like when did that happen?? How long has that been a thing? Where have I been??? Especially after feeling for so long that our shared goals and dreams would keep us journeying till death do us part......So here we are where our paths split......never to be one again....running parallel because of our kids but otherwise entirely different......I am not sure how he is feeling about his road moving forward, however even with all the complicated feelings involved at the moment, I truly believe I have to wish him well in my heart and let go of his hand........stand at the crossroad and say goodbye.......As for me, for my road, the past 20 years have strengthened me, given me faith, given me hope, given me grit, and a fierceness that will carry me down my new road alone......The me of long ago would never have been able to stand at the crossroads with excitement and exhilaration, she would have been too scared, too sad, it would have broken her heart, she wouldn't have been confident in her ability to pull it off.......she would have second guessed herself, she wouldn't have believed in herself, relied on herself.......trusted herself.........however the me that is here now is 100% confident in my abilities to not only sorta pull it off, but kinda kill it;-) I trust myself, believe in myself, and certainly have been able to rely on myself for quite some time now......My journey ahead is full of so many things I have denied myself all these years while I was putting another before me........my new path will be filled with self care. loving myself, pouring into myself, finding out new things about ME, having extra energy and time to pour into my kids, and coming into my own even more than I feel I already have been......Your 40s are a magical decade, I have felt that way since the moment I entered them, and I don't plan on wasting one more minute of that magic.......
jperuso
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