Somebody sent me a book with this title.....and it was amazing and it got me thinking of this as it relates to our lives........as we journey we encounter lots of places that scare us.....and normally those are the places that we need to be in......because in that fear we find our brave.....or our strength.......or our own way out........I have been in places that have scared me before in my life.....having Gabe was terrifying......like super terrifying......I felt scared every minute and I had to wrestle that fear down......find a way to not let it swallow me up......not let it consume me.....because very much like pain being scared is a motivator because it requires us to try and find our peace.....find our balance.....find our way out.....because just like one cannot live in pain all of the time, you can't live in fear all of the time either.......this situation that I have been in has not evoked much fear in me.....which has surprised me because it is so huge.....such a big deal.......however certain moments along the way have scared me.....made me wonder what to do our how I should proceed......and maybe I am not so fearful these days because I have learned to TRUST myself so much........like above all else.....I have friends and family, and people I talk to about my path, but in the end I am choosing what I am doing on my own, and on my own terms......not worried if it gains anybody's approval.....the only approval I feel like I need these days is mine....and that is kinda exhilarating.......it has come at a high price, the highest of prices........ a price that has forced me deep into myself, and into the deepest parts of me.....to dig in those deep places and see what comes to the surface....and as stuff emerges I am learning more and more everyday.....I know as I move along my path there will be places that may scare me......places that will challenge me.......make me feel uncomfortable.....force me to grow.....force me to find my brave......and as I have welcomed the pain in....sat and drank coffee with it......chatted with it and then let it go each time it comes......I will do the same with the places that scare me.....have them come in......serve them coffee......find out their purpose, find out what they are supposed to teach me........find a way to get through the afraid and find the lesson.....find the way out.......the places that scare me I think will come more often as I begin to rebuild my life.....and I am committed to letting those places scare me, feeling that, then just letting it go and moving toward the next courageous thing......until one day perhaps there won't be any other places that will ever scare me again..........
jperuso
Comments