My Mads is a gift.....a bonus blessing in this life....my journey to her was not easy, and I thought in honor of her birthday today, I should share :) When Gabe was two we considered having another baby, and at the same time we discovered that my ex had cancer...........however we did try for another baby then, in between his surgery and treatment, and I got pregnant......much to my excitement, and feeling like God had blessed us....only to miscarry 8 weeks later......I felt like that pregnancy was off from the beginning....it didn't feel right from the beginning......so we felt like maybe the answer was no, and that a baby wasn't in our future......and 8 years went by and life kept marching on.....but then right before I turned 40, nearly 10 years after I had had Gabe, we decided to go for it again....it was a now or never kinda thing.......and we both wanted another child.....and ironically at the same time a yearning for a daughter came over my heart.....I am sort of a "you get what you get and don't get upset kinda vibe lol:)" but I wanted a daughter in this lifetime.....and when I got pregnant I was over the moon, and when I found out it was a girl.....well.....I was even more excited! My pregnancy with her was awesome.....I had to be poked and prodded a bunch due to my age and having had Gabe prematurely.......but I didn't care.....I was just happy to be pregnant with her, and so excited to meet her! Having a typical delivery, even though it had to be another c-section, was also full circle for me.....having had Gabe under such intense circumstances left me yearning for the "normal" having a baby experience.....and as soon as they took her out and held her up I burst into tears of relief.......like I had made it somehow.....she was here.....safe......my Gilly:) and the nurses and doctors all commented on how wide eyed and peaceful she was.....she would just lay there taking it all in......like there was deep wisdom in those eyes.....the one nurse took her in the night to gave her a bath, and when she brought her back commented on how intense she was, and sweet, just staring at her.....and they all commented on what a pretty little baby she was:) I thought so too.......and raising her has been an absolute joy......all of it......she was an amazing baby, toddler, and now little girl......just so so fun and sweet, and kind, and thoughtful, and deep, and intelligent, and compassionate, and just all of it.....she is one of my favorite people....and I truly enjoy hanging out with her.......I will forever be grateful that God finally said yes, and blessed my life with her.....I wish her all beautiful things today and every day! :) It is my privilege to watch her grow! Happy 7th birthday Miss Mads:)
jperuso
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