I am learning........how to possess one of these......a teflon ego......one that can withstand repeated hits and stay on the high road........I am learning to become not bothered, as much, by the assault my ego takes on a regular basis, at the hands of small minded and petty nonsense.......and it is a skill that I hope to hone to the point where nothing bothers me at all.....not ever again......because all of what people do to us is a reflection of themselves, and the relationship that they have with themselves......and by practicing my pause on a regular basis it gives me the space I need to lay my ego down.......just set it on the ground........and stand in my true self...........and not react in a way that I will regret........choose to act with intention versus reacting..........and it isn't easy.......truth is I deal with a great deal of nonsense and things that are highly unfair to me in every single way.......and it requires me to summon my strength to not get caught up in it......not let it in my air space, and choose to walk in peace and let SO many things go.......to not let them get in and threaten my peace.....it is a good skill for what I am currently dealing with but really for all of life......how many times do we allow others to steal our joy or ruin our day, or several hours of our precious lives.......it just doesn't have to be that way if we let go.....not let our ego answer the call in front of us.......let our heart and the true essence of who we are answer that call, and proceed in our best selves each and every day......in each and every interaction we have with the people we encounter.....it is a choice to sink or rise......it is easier to give in and get sucked into somebody's dysfunction, their pettiness.....but it takes some mindfulness and strength to CHOOSE NOT TO........and I am getting better and better at it each time.......because it is my choice.......it is my choice how I want to spend my time......there is not a doubt in my mind that if I hadn't chosen this path early on, by this time there would have been an all out war ensuing.........but I am choosing not to go to war and fight battles that don't need to be fought................I choose to battle only what needs to be battled.......and only the things that truly matter............ I am committed to doing that each day.......not entertaining what isn't my life, and what doesn't ring true in my heart........and I will continue to walk in strength......walk in my peace that I walked through hell to claim........not allowing it to be up for grabs for anybody......not anybody.......and each time I successfully not react out of ego and act with intention and mindfulness I WIN.......I win by keeping my sanity......my peace.....my joy in this life and I get to feel proud of myself and feel like the example I am setting for my kids is one that is so extremely important......they are watching my every move since the earthquake struck and it is so very important for them to see me walking in a way that shows them how you behave when the world comes crashing down.......and damn do I try so very hard to do that each and every day for them......one of my friends always says to me "The high road is your road Jenn," and it is! That is true.......and that truth helps feed and strengthen my soul on the days I feel weak......that I can say that to myself.......that I haven't lowered myself to meet them on their road.......staying in my lane........in my truth.......true to Jenn every single step of the way.......I have often said I had no control over what happened to me but I definitely have control in how I walk in it.........I get to say what that looks like.......and it feels so good to be proud of that........so my goal is to have a teflon ego.......not bothered by a damn thing that anybody does related to their journey........just commit to LETTING IT ALL GO.........reminding myself everyday that it matters not.......truly :)
jperuso
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