I debated on writing about this......but there was really no way I couldn't......the universe most definitely has a sense of humor......God and every force that surrounds us got to have their say yesterday and this morning I am both feeling amused and perplexed;-) Awhile ago I had written a blog about letting go of an important friend in my life......and the pain I had found there......a friend that had entered my story just when I needed him most......a friend that I had grown to love and appreciate deeply......and one that most definitely changed my life and my story in so many ways.......but at a certain point it became clear that I needed to release him, so that he could find what he was looking for long term and so could I......both of us seemingly headed in different directions, yet finding ourselves in a circle that was so powerful to jump out from......so since then we have had some contact on and off from afar....but never like it had once been......and I have missed him and his friendship, but have trusted the bigger part of me that understands that it must be this way......and wanting him to live his life free and for me to be able to be free too.......we had never met up in real life through our friendship.....distance making that an issue........and it had been a regret of us both, mostly due to the deep friendship we had forged, and being unable to "SEE" the other.......so recently it became apparent that it may be easier if I blocked our lives on social media......making it easier to continue walking our paths.......placing more distance between our stories......and it was hard for me but felt like the right thing to do......it was not all that long ago that I decided to do that.......and then came yesterday......I had visited a friend who had broken her arm.....bringing her lunch and having a lovely visit......had decided since the kids are with their dad this weekend, that I would have the other half of my lunch for dinner.....so then I ran home to drop it off......I headed to TJMaxx to wander about.......one of my favorite things to do sans kiddos;-).......ending my trip there with an impulsive decision to go to the grocery store quickly.......a store I have only been in once or twice........to change my dinner plans and maybe find something else I wanted to eat last night......and I wandered around the grocery store for a minute.......and in an attempt to leave I ducked out of the crowd down an aisle that was empty.......empty until he came walking down it!!!!! In real life......lol:) I am so curious what the people around us thought, because we were both instantly in shock..... and said as much aloud......amused and smiling but crazy shocked to be in each other's presence..... and it was like a jolt of lightning struck the ground between us.....time stood still and I had no idea what to do really........and the details are hazy it was so intense ;-) and this situation has likely challenged me more than most......as there never seems to be a clear direction, or at least one that sticks.....I feel like I get the clarity I need and then.........so for now it feels kinda impossible due to surrounding circumstances......but the irony of my blocking him and then not too too long later nearly bumping into him is not lost on me......and the circumstances of the day yesterday that led us both there.......so for now I will be amused at the universe's funny joke.......wonder what God's message to me was in that moment, what I am supposed to get from it all..... wonder what it means.......or doesn't.....and remember, as I have said many times.......timing is everything.......and I am being guided, no question, and my journey is my own, and what is meant for me will always be meant for me............and what isn't will always fall away.......and no matter what human power I place on it all, it will all find a way and come to find me no matter what.......I trust every minute of it......and I marvel at the moving pieces, at the complexities, at the wonder and the magic of it all:)
jperuso
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