Secrets......

I love the word secret......the definition being not known or meant to be known or seen by others.....it is a cool word, my word nerd rejoicing in it lol:) and I have come to earn the reputation that people's secrets stay secrets with me......I am loyal to the things people tell me.....and I believe we should have people in our lives that can keep our secrets....hold them sacred and steady....and some things are appropriate to be kept in that space.....but what I have come to realize more, as my story has unfolded, is the danger of holding secrets that are crushing us....and the value in letting our stories see the light of day.....I carried the weight of my ex husband's affair on my own.....telling only a couple of friends......but the weight of it was crushing in every way.....and speaking our truth is where we can set ourselves free.....and the worry, or the thing that holds people back from that, is the fear of what others will think.....and as I sit here today I can say that no matter what your role in a story is, people will spin it to suit them, and vilify the victim on repeat.....so people will say what they will, and none of it has to do with the truth, or with you, so don't let that hold you back.....and your truth matters.....the reason my story has worked, and brought me to the places it has needed to, is due to my commitment to be honest and open about it from the beginning.....I was so tired of hiding in the secret....the secret crushing my soul.......and it was enough.....and there is a pocket of folks that felt I should have kept the secret.....to preserve the player's reputations....and well....I don't agree......this was my story, one I did not ask for....one I did not create....and what I have done with the pieces of my old life is my business......but there is power in saying the truth.....and not having secrets.....we all have some spaces of our lives that we seek to keep our own......but the stuff that shapes us, and makes us, should see the light of day.....and help us be a beacon of hope for others.....there are a lot of folks keeping secrets about the same stuff we all face.....and it makes people feel alone........I felt so alone carrying that affair secret for so long......it was heavy.....and the release of it brought such levity to my spirit......secrets keep people sick......that is true.........healing and health comes with speaking your truth....and letting it out.....and it is true that truth makes others uncomfortable.....but it is normally the people that hide behind their own secrets that get uncomfortable......not the people that see the value of owning your own life......whatever that looks like.....so I guess my message today is to keep your friend's secrets fiercely.....we all need those friends:) But also seek to stand in your truth, your full beautiful truth, as much as you can:) It will set you free!!! Happy Friday:)