I am referring to ego.....it is the biggest trap that humans must be mindful of......one of the biggest lessons I have learned this year.......I use it often surrounding my divorce and in dealing with my ex and his girlfriend......if you can be easily offended and affected by what others say and do you can most definitely be manipulated, and subject to all sorts of things......I don't find I need to use it as often these days, that helps, but it comes up all the time.....we can choose to have another's actions wound us, use our energy talking about it.....obsessing about it......all of it....OR......we can assume it is their stuff and that it truly has little or nothing to do with us, and we can LET IT GO........for instance......I feel I have done some things that would be considered above and beyond as it pertains to the relationship I have tried to forge among the three of us......and he doesn't acknowledge the things I do, or hasn't yet......and in that simple moment I know with my whole heart I am not in it for his acknowledgement......I am in it for the greater good......so if I get caught in the injustice of the lack of his recognition, and his appreciation all is lost......and my ego has won......I could write several blogs on all the times I have had to put my ego aside, to forge a relationship with the other woman.......as it pertains to my children.......to all of it.......lots of swallowing of pride and stuff.......and you know what every bit of it has been worth it and worth the peace I have found.......and ironically laying down our ego requires us to really turn within many times.......we need to worry about ourselves plain and simple.......we need to control our actions, and thoughts, and let what everybody else does go as much as we can.......none of it is personal......none of it is our business really in a true sense.......it is other people's manifestations of their journey......it is possible to not be offended by much at all.....now I am not implying to not say your piece if that is what you are led to do......I do that......but it doesn't come, too often, from a bruised ego or from being offended.......in fact I cannot think of the last time I was offended???......we are the ones that give the power to those in our lives.......we really do......and we can take that power back by harnessing the power of our reaction, and using it in a way that removes the offense.......and sometimes I can still step in the snare of that.....and I try and catch myself......a good sign is when you begin to feel anger and injustice by what somebody has done to you.....or said about you.....and as I said I am not suggesting that you allow people to step on you........if you feel compelled to address it.......I am fully encouraging that.......I am just encouraging doing it from a place that is not offended......or does not hold a bruised ego.......it makes a huge difference.....it allows you to be neutral and calm and centered.......I mean if I think of my marriage, or marriages in general......how many arguments are a result of ego pokes.....lots right??? It is the fastest way to get into a confrontation........and when love is involved it most definitely is harder to temper your ego.......lots of feelings......but I plan on continuing to practice it.......practice the art of not getting offended.......not allowing other people's stuff get in........not taking stuff personally........I have stopped doing so much of that and true freedom is found there........most of the time it just isn't personal.......and it doesn't need our attention and energy.......use that energy to lay that ego down, and move on and be free each and every time:)
jperuso
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