I have become enamored by the journey of life since my world came crashing down.......and it is something I like to explore, and understand, and spend time examining.....both in my life and in the lives of others.......and for me it never gets old.....and recently I was reminded of the "just around the corner" notion......I have known people in my life that have lost loved ones due to suicide......and what has always struck me about that is this notion......we never know what beauty lies right around the corner......just right there...and my heart always hurts for the person that took their life......the hopelessness, and the potential of missing the right around the corner stuff.....and as much as we think we can feel the predictable undertones of our lives.....or think we know what is going to happen, we just can never really know.....that fact has been proven to me as of late, in both wonderful and challenging ways.......and I suppose the key is to walk in our stories with a willingness to explore whatever is up ahead......being open to what comes.....or what helps us.....or heals us.....and I have written many times.....that love is the point.....just love.....love for one another.....love for ourselves.....love......and I suppose it is what drives me, and keeps my passion burning for my mission in helping other women......knowing how hopeless I felt.....and how absolutely shattered I felt.....and feeling like initially there was no way out.....no way that light, and love, and happiness would find me again.....not authentically.....and I was completely wrong.....completely.....and if I hadn't walked around the corner.....through the mess that was my life.....and truthfully continues to be at certain points.....I wouldn't have gotten to see THIS life.....the one that I am blessed to be living.....and so the just round the corner notion is a powerful one.....nothing is hopeless.....nothing......and when we release the need to control it we live......really live.....I will give you an example of something that made me realize my new mindset......Mads went rafting with my parents, and my brother and his wife.....and she saw the kids cliff jumping in the river.....and she is all in:) wanting to do it......and I know that about her......she has a deeply adventurous spirit.....and a few people that I spoke with were speaking of the dangers of it, and the what ifs etc etc......and I would have done that too in the past.....moving from fear in my life.....instead of trusting it all......that Mads journey might involve some thrills, ones that won't take her life but add to HER journey......and it is up to her to some degree......not me.....my fears have been replaced....even within motherhood.....with the deep faith that what will be will be.....and that our journey is divinely orchestrated.....filled with what is meant for us.....in its time.....no matter what......so we need not hang on too tightly to stuff and move in fear......so if Mads wants to cliff jump when she is a bigger girl.....that is OK with me.....She needs to be free to be herself too.....without my imposing my own stuff on her.....she has a great head on her shoulders and is wise and thoughtful........and adventure lies around every corner.....and having adventures is what makes life worth living.........what a blessing to be alive:) Happy Thursday! :)
jperuso
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