Early on I wrote about fairness and justice and railing against it......and I felt it was time to revisit it, because my perspective on it has shifted some and evolved........from the moment this happened there has been very little that has come to find me that has been "fair"......fair in the true sense of the word........but fair is such a loaded term.....what is fair? Certainly not life itself, not our dealings in the day to day, not how we are always treated by others, or by strangers.......so it leads me to think about what we should "expect"......and I think in our expectations that sense of unfairness becomes magnified and maybe that is the key......to just let go of the expectation of any of it, and certainly to not get caught up in the "life is unfair bit".....because lets face it it just isn't....I know that to be true.....if it had been fair I would not be sitting here......and I have certainly absorbed the many unjust moments since that Thursday night......but it can be viewed like that......OR it can be viewed like this......I am finding a life I LOVE........a life that gets me up in the morning excited about the day.......a life where I am learning to thrive amid the suffering instead of just survive....a life I have such peace in, in my heart and soul......a place in the world where I total faith in what lies ahead.....and am excited about the journey......the others in this story don't have any of those things.......so is that justice? Does it come in a sneaky way......in the quiet moments, in the calm.....in the subtleties.....instead of in the ways of "this is fair"...."this isn't fair".....you "deserve" this......you "don't deserve that."......by the way I don't love the words deserve.....because I don't think we deserve anything and are blessed with whatever comes......but you get the idea....... I guess my point is that getting caught up in seeing justice and fairness play out the way we think it should......or getting caught up in feeling the weight of unfair moments as they come......prevents us from staying mindful of the big picture.......and of seeing the justice find our lives.....the true fabric of our lives.....the essence of our spirits.....the lives we lead.....and I don't think there is anyone.......or any scenario that can rob us of that justice and that peace......and so as I continue......knowing many more "unfair" moments will come to find me in this process.....so many..........I will choose to not get caught up in them.......to not rail against them......and just know that justice is reigning over the entirety of my life and being.......... and bringing me all the things my heart desires........because justice and fairness is a trap in this journey.....a place where one can become lost and jaded if they let themselves.......getting their foot snarled and caught in the trap......and it just isn't worth the price that is paid, it is up to me to provide "fair treatment" to ME......not waiting for others to bring fair treatment to me.......I will continue to see the justice in all the injustice......and be grateful for it all.........
jperuso
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