Ok so I wrote about watching some silly reality TV as of late......and we all need a little guilty pleasure sometimes;-) but it has made me understand more the flaws in modern dating.....and I hope I can articulate it in a way that makes sense and conveys what has come to me.....I have been watching Married At First Sight and Love is Blind......and while they are both different shows.....and different premises, there is commonality between them....so stay with me lol;-) Married At First Sight is based on matchmakers and "experts" pairing two people based on a slew of things they have in common and compatibility and they meet at the altar blindly.......and Love is Blind is speed dating behind walls in these pods.....and focusing solely on building a connection and getting to know one another deeply, leading to some of the singles proposing sight unseen, and then deciding once they get to know each other behind the walls if they will get married......so here is what I will say, both of the shows do not honor the institution of marriage, and the sacredness found there.....and how big of a decision it is to share your life with another....and what it means to be married and stay the course....I will most definitely say that....BUT here is what I found interesting as I was watching.......there is no question a physical attraction piece when it comes to dating and finding a partner......we all have a "type" or things that are appealing to us.....and often times in this show there have been couples matched up, or that have found each other, with looks taken out of the equation, that are not each other's "type" or attraction wise what they would look for, and because of the other factors in play it ends up working for some, and still not working for others, because they cannot get past the lack of physical attraction, despite the strong connection in other areas.......interesting right?? At least I think so lol:) so it made me think more deeply about modern dating as a whole.....and that is the problem! I have touched on pieces of it before but that is IT......it is ALL based on physical attraction initially online, and preconceived notions about our own attractions to others, and what we want.....so likely folks that are doing online dating are swiping left and discarding somebody, that truly may be in line with them, or could be a great match based on real compatibility.......because there is no real substance.....and that is what is wrong......alongside the other things I have written about it in my blogs before;-) ......dating behind a computer screen eliminates the human connection part....the part we all seek.....and the part the people on these shows are seeking....well mostly;-) they are fed up in their 30s with the dating scene....and in desperate need of finding a person to share their lives with and connect in a real way.....I feel like maybe when I was 30 and got married, I sort of skated into the last time span before all this online madness took over.....and as I outline the challenges and issues, I do not have a solution to it all lol.....not a way to transform online dating, sorry maybe someday I will figure out a way lol....but my sharing that issue and my aha moment...... doesn't account for meant to be, serendipity, magic and all the rest of what I believe in deeply:) So even with a dating platform wrought with challenges, I believe that love always finds a way.....your person always finds you across the cosmos.....somehow, some way, always......and even across an online dating platform.....I have seen it in folks around me.......so perhaps love can transcend modern dating.....perhaps:) Happy Thursday! :)
jperuso
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