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jperuso

I believe........

I have faith in the things I cannot see.......I really do........even if I forget that sometimes. I believe that what is meant for me will always show up, when it is supposed to, and not a moment before or a moment later than it should........that is a beautiful certainty to live with. It brings me enormous peace when I try to get up inside my head and think that I am smarter than my faith;-) I believe that that notion also applies to the good stuff and the bad stuff......believe that they all come when they are supposed to, with purpose, intention, with a key to living our life's purpose. The life we were meant to lead.............Without the things that come to us we would stagnate......stay the same......not change........and in the things that visit us we find our way to the things we are supposed to do. EVERY single thing, person, or experience that has visited me has created who I am today. Some of those things left me kicking and screaming, fighting the transformation for a bit, until I surrendered to what it was trying to teach me........and all of it taught me.....woke me up, made me conscious of what I want from this life and what I don't.....never to forget again........but it made me wonder where the strength of my faith and belief came from? Because truth is I lean on it a lot.....any time my brain gets going.....starts wandering down a path where I think I can outthink, predict, control in some way......I just fall back into my faith......like a giant pillow and let go......instantly stopping the insanity of shouldering things I cannot carry.......I can do all things in my faith, every single day.......but I cannot try to think my way through much of what I am faced with, I just can't.......creates too much turmoil.....brings too much burden to my heart.......I am thinking the foundation was laid once upon a time at church, as a kid........I was open to all things God, all things faith, all things vacation Bible school, Sunday school, choir, youth group all of it.....and maybe it started there. However as a kid I never used that foundation to lean on and lean into my faith, I fretted far too often.......but it likely began in those spaces in my heart......then I supposeI collected faith over the years as my soul was tested in the fires of my life......and in those big moments, I was left understanding they were just too big for me to manage alone........too big to think my brain alone can solve it all......and in that understanding I found that letting go was what needed to be......letting my faith take the lead.....step up to the plate and show me the way......and each time I have come to that, the experience immediately changed......the angst I was holding in my body fell away.....peace returned to my entire body and I just trusted.........trusted that I am right where I am meant to be each and every day.......so I believe in what is meant for me...........I believe in things I cannot see, the things I can feel.......I believe in the journey........I believe in faith........and for that I am so very grateful.........

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