So today I took a personal day to actually do something fun......and I was thinking it has been years since I have done that......all of my time off is normally swallowed up in taking off for the kids......mostly Gabe over the years, and I wasn't ever able to roll any time over from year to year......and this year I was lucky to have had extra sick and personal time due to the last couple of years, and a lot of the working from home.......so I don't have a lot time left but felt I needed to take the personal day to be a part of today's plans! I am super excited.....and it feels really good to give to myself in this way......I am normally so practical, and talk myself out of things that I shouldn't......and that is part of the new deal, that is this year.......I am not doing that anymore.......I am saying yes way more often than no......following the passion of my heart.......and doing what makes me happy and fully living my life.......and it is such an important thing to do......you only get one shot at life and you should be doing stuff that makes you happy......things that give you experiences that you can take with you as you travel.......taking more risks.......carving out space for bucket list adventures......all of it......and that is what I plan on doing.......doing all of that and more.......and this is in line with my passion for helping women......helping them find a place for themselves in their lives.......a place where they can be seen and heard.......a place where they can take some time for themselves.......without feeling that pang of duty or guilt.......or "I should be doing this" or " I should be doing that"......it is truly toxic to live in that space all of the time.....we need to understand, truly understand, we can be great moms.......AND..........do other stuff too.......so I view today as progress.......progress in my mindset shifting.......and in doing something I haven't done in a decade or more.......use a personal day for what it is intended for.......and not for doctor appointments or sick kids! If you are reading this and can relate......I encourage you to perhaps do the same! Do something for you! Something that makes you happy.......something that is worthwhile on your next day off........self care is not selfish....it is so so necessary.......It has taken me so long to break free of that.........of all the practical responsibility stuff.......and it is not to say I am reckless......far from it;-) but being practical and responsible can really take over, and take over every decision, always.....and I don't think that is good either......I think balance is always better........so as I seek to find the balance between the competing parts of old Jenn and new Jenn, as I integrate them and figure out where I am headed and who I want to be in this life.......I am remaining mindful of that.....I wrote a little bit ago about how that is my therapist's favorite question......"Who do you want to be in this story, or this situation?"....we should be asking ourselves that often.....and for today, I want to be the girl who said yes to the personal day to enjoy the plans of today! I am worth it:)
jperuso
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