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jperuso

Hello darkness, my old friend........

On and off for a little bit, I have started waking in the night for a little while and struggling to fall back to sleep......and I don't like when it pops up due to it interrupting a good night's sleep, which my Taurus needs and has come to love;-) but still there is something comforting about that time of the night, or the early morning hours that I get up in now......to me.........there is a peace and a stillness in those times of day that is only found then......and my relationship with sleep has drastically changed in my new life......I think your sleep changes throughout all of your life......your baby years find you fighting it.....and when you are a child.....and then the teen years find you, and you can't get enough......and then you run on little sleep during college and beyond....and you have children.....and well.....:) Never sleep the same....but then your kids grow, and you can sleep some again! And I have come to get more sleep overall in this version of my life.....my kids go to bed early and so do I......I don't have a reason to stay up and Netflix and chill with somebody:) And getting up at 4 to workout, and do all I do in the morning before I head out, comes EARLY.....so it has been working.......until lately.....and I guess I can't be surprised it is.....I am carrying a lot at the moment....my life full of busy and some heavy moving pieces......and lots to figure out, and work out, even with my deep faith in tow.....so I am trying to spend my waking hours during the day, organizing all of the parts, so that when I wake up my brain doesn't feel the need to do it then......but the last few nights I have still been up for well over 2 hours a night......so it has been challenging me some.....because I am also tired from all I have needed to do, and need some rest:) Each night has been improved so I am hoping it will pass by, and a solid night will find me again soon! I have some really super exciting things coming up, alongside some more challenging ones....and the two spaces in this chapter are quite different.....the light and the darkness.....and sometimes life is like that......and I always marvel at life's ability to show you both, sometimes at the same time.......and I continue to remain faithful in the trials that find my life....knowing that they help us, challenge us, stretch us, and push us to grow into the versions of ourselves we are meant to be....so while I am sipping my coffee this morning, and feeling a bit tired.....I am looking around at the stillness, under the soft glow of the lights on my mantle.....and feeling the comforting quality it brings me, a peace I have made in the darkness.......always.....Happy Tuesday! :)

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