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jperuso

Captivated by the story.......

SO I think so often about the stuff my soul was tethered to, not all that long ago.....I was tied to routine.....to normalcy.....to day to day life.....to outcome.......to the illusion of stability.....to wanting so badly to have my life color in the lines.....to have a life that made sense and matched social norms and ideals........to remain in tact and normal out of fear.....out of being scared about what would happen if it all fell apart......and then as it shattered and fell away......like somebody gave me a hard shove from a plane and I was just falling through the air screaming.......I soon realized that the power I had was in the letting GO of all of those things......realizing none of it matters.....or ever really did.......and as I started to freely let go, my fear subsided.....it vanished.....I am rarely afraid these days which feels kinda great.....I have lived many chapters of my life battling fear......too many......and now I am just captivated by the story......so excited about what could be on the next page of my life.....or in the next chapter.......in the uncertainty, the endless uncertainty........ I am finding the fearless parts of me......accepting it is all uncertain and I cannot wait to see how it unfolds.......so I don't carry fear in my pocket anymore, distracting me from what is in front of my eyes.......unfolding in my life.....in real time......I soak it in.....and appreciate it.......and it feels so much better.......I don't worry, I trust......I don't obsess I let go......I don't rob myself of my peace.......I let it wrap itself around me.....knowing how to keep it now.....knowing what I need to do to have it stay the cornerstone of my life......and as the pages turn I get more and more excited to see what is next! Feeling the intensity building but this time in a good way......in a way that makes me feel that something kinda amazing is right around the corner....a chapter away......a place that maybe I haven't even dreamed of yet! Something super exciting showed up for me yesterday........In the morning on FB I saw a women's empowerment event in February. One that will be well attended it seems too! There are vendors going to be there but some women also speaking their truth and telling their stories to inspire other women. I had the strong intuition and nudge that it was meant for me......I got up enough courage to message the lady and lay it all out there, and she responded very quickly totally getting it, and I filled the last speaking spot and will be going to share my story and life coaching! EEK:) I also have to send a picture and bio for a press release! It is a huge step in moving forward and leading to new and exciting page turning in the future! I told her I was grateful for the opportunity and thanked her, and she said I grabbed the opportunity and that God must have big plans for me! That really touched me, definitely the God having a plan for me, and the confirmation of such........but also the new Jenn, seizing what she believes is hers.....fearlessly putting herself out there and trusting when she leaps........when I messaged her, I thought the worst thing she can say is NO right? I am a big enough girl to hear no if that is what is meant to be said to me.....so I remained true to myself in my message to her, being honest and true about who I am.......and instead the answer was a HUGE YES! This has the potential to open up a lot of doors for me and I am wildly excited! Had trouble sleeping last night lol:) So I am committed to the journey, not the outcome, like I said yesterday......but also to reading my story, with enthusiasm.......crafting the story of the rest of my life with authenticity and excitement! Every single step! YAY!!!

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