I have loved inconsiderate men in my life.....that is just the truth.....and obviously people are not one thing or the other totally.....and there are places of them that were considerate some, perhaps for awhile.....but the core of them was not.....and yet they wanted and expected consideration from me at every turn.....which is what always strikes me about it all when I think of it.......I do believe I am considerate of others.....I am not perfect but I try pretty hard......and on my date Sunday that was a big takeaway......I felt considered by him at many points throughout the day, in ways I have never felt before.....and you can feel when somebody is trying to impress you, or if they are moving from their own inherent nature......and his was the latter......he is a considerate human......not selfish or self serving in his own needs......and it was very moving for me.....in a way that led me to that realization.....wondering what happens when two people that are considerate hang out.....kinda cool stuff happens:).....I pour, you pour....we pour......and I have written that before.....on my quest to date.....wanting somebody that pours into me the ways I pour into them......and so far that is what I am feeling......and really enjoying....it is fun to get to know somebody......and pay attention to the things that make them them......it is hurtful to give consideration to somebody......pour endlessly into them, and receive nothing or next to nothing in return......and unfortunately it happens often in this world.....the givers and takers remember.......we all fall into a category......and the idea that my new adventure partner will be considerate of me......and perhaps that is something I can count on....is well.....yeah.......something.....and it got me thinking.....what makes a person considerate....like really....is it how they are raised?.....are we taught how to be considerate? Is it in our nature?......Is it learned, or just within us......and when you are a giver you have to be careful......and when you consider everybody around you over yourself......because it can become unbalanced......and there is a silly spot in givers that believes this.......that if they give enough......or the right stuff......the person they are giving to will give back.....and that my friends is fool's gold.......not true in any sense.....trust me, I have tested that more than once.....and the takers will just take.....and take.....oh and take some more, and enjoy all the consideration they are being shown....true story.....so I guess my point in writing this today is to share the awareness and my observations about my new friend;-) but also to remind those of you out there......giving and giving to the point of depletion......hoping your person will show up finally and give.....that that isn't going to happen.......and that the power lies in removing yourself from them.....when things become hard.....when you have to start telling somebody how to treat you.....there is your sign.....the people you spend your time and energy on should be people that consider you period......and care about how you feel.....and how they make you feel....that is a barometer of a person I seek to be around......how they make other people feel....so I am excited to think that when I spend time with him I will continue to feel cared for and considered, in a way that is new for me....and that I will learn to allow myself to accept those things....and fall into it some.....and it is in the power of contrast that those spaces become so obvious....and sometimes it is when those missing pieces show up that the most powerful realization is found.....I am hopeful I will continue to find the things I seek and experience the contrast finally of all of it, Amen:)
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