Acclimate is a great word right? I love the way it sounds.....but I am a word nerd so ;-) But the truth is I have had to acclimate to so much in this story.....sometimes all at once....sometimes bit by bit.....but forever acclimating......and adjusting......and accepting.....and moving......and one of my biggest adjustments has come from going from two incomes down to one.....at 45 years old......during a time when finances were no longer an issue in my life at all........and in the beginning it didn't feel quite so intense, I was able to acclimate to it relatively easily, but as the cost of living has gone up, and my having to refinance my home to pay him off happened, increasing my mortgage by $400 a month, I know right!......I am feeling it some......and I am working on ways to combat it some....knowing that this won't be the case forever.....it just won't.......and I can always work more and figure it out if it comes to that.......but it is hard not to worry sometimes.....I have written about worry often.....I consider myself a reformed worrier......mostly.....my faith growing so much in this story, that the shadow of that faith washes out any worry that arises......because worry is futile.....it truly is.....everything always will, and does work out.....but what I do acknowledge as it comes up are my feelings surrounding so much.....all of the things that my ex did not need to adjust to.....jumping into another home, another person there, two incomes......not too many practical adjustments to acclimate to....however he has had other things to acclimate to though......that I know.....but we have not had the same journey for sure after we parted ways......and I did not intend to be in my late 40s and have to think about money again.....I just didn't......been there done that lol:) but here I am.....and maybe it is one of the biggest adjustments we make after we divorce....a big topic, often not looked at as closely as the rest.....it redefines your financial stability, future, all of it.....and in my case came calling against my will initially.....no power in it.....turning over $50,000 in equity and half of my pension.....I know ouch right!!!.....the legal system is rough.......but sometimes we need to just accept the things that come....and trust the outcome.....and I do.....at the end of the day it is just money.....and not as important, or as precious as the gifts, and freedom I received as a result of what happened.....I truly believe that from the depths of my soul and who I am......I reclaimed my health, my happiness, my peace, and a life that lights me up, and just so much more.....those things don't carry a price tag.....they just don't.......and I know I will always be Ok.....even though I had to start over some, later in the game:) And when the stress of it piles up .....I turn to gratitude.....gratitude is another escape hatch from worry, it helps you put worry in its place;-) I am grateful that I have kept myself afloat for nearly 3 years....and grateful the kids and I get to live the life we do.....even when it is challenging.....and I trust in what is ahead for us, and trust in the provisions that are found there:) One day, one challenge, one moment at a time....and I got this;-)
jperuso
Comments