Acceptance........

I believe without a doubt that I have reached acceptance in my grief of all that has happened.....it has arrived in pieces.....little bite size ones, one part at a time until it has created an acceptance that wraps around all of it in my heart and mind......I am grateful for that every single day.....grief is not linear though and so some of those other stages of grief circle around at times, having their say......but not nearly as often......I had lunch with my parents yesterday, a rare treat.....and we were talking about all of it and how free I am of so many parts, not bothered by things that used to bother me......or able to do things in this story that I never thought I would be able to......so my acceptance has come and landed at my doorstep, a big red bow around it freeing me to move forward......and I have long believed the notion that in acceptance there is peace.......and that is so very true, the fighting, the railing against, as I have said before is futile.......in every single way......but what does it take for us to reach acceptance? That is the question that was on my mind this morning, alongside Easter Sunday and the resurrection......how do we resurrect ourselves through our acceptance of the day to day and what finds us.......come back stronger and filled with more light.......and I think part of it lies in the surrender to our circumstance, allowing it to just be as it is, instead of how we think it should be.....I owe Gabe for that.......when I had him and it was so complicated, and he was so small, and it was so challenging........I fought against for a little bit.....wishing for it to be different.....easier.....normal......and in that fighting against it all I found was more misery.......more heartache......and more challenges......so it was in the getting a hold of my mindset......adjusting my expectation........and accepting what is to flow that peace and power was restored.......and it was the first time I understood that acceptance brings us that peace......I am currently working on accepting another piece of my life that I cannot change....and it will take the same willingness as the rest to lean back and float.....accepting it all as it comes.......and I am getting there......it is powerful what lies there for us if we can just get past the rest......each day is a new opportunity to learn to accept our lives as they show up......accept what is for us, and what isn't.....understand that sometimes what we want isn't what we are going to get......and that best laid plans.....well they are just that.....and we need to be willing at any point to change our course......the lessons keep coming to me and I am embracing them all......they are lessons I needed to learn for good.......ones that come bearing peace and hope! And ones that are always worth learning! Enjoy your Easter Sunday! Hope it is blessed indeed:)