I have written and remarked often in this chapter about the sense of aliveness that has consumed my life in this chapter......so fully......and yesterday was exercising that so freely....we had a virtual instruction day....and I am not going to lie, it brought back lots of memories from teaching during the pandemic.....which have I mentioned was such a crazy and strange time lol:) Like what???? It was like living some surreal reality.....time and space feeling bent some, as

I spent MANY years keeping my mouth shut to keep the peace.....not standing up for myself.....letting people walk on me some.....part of it was fine....we don't have to attend every fight we are invited to.....we just don't.....laying our ego down is enlightenment, in every way:) If your ego can be manipulated easily, well so can you......so some stuff doesn't matter......but I have learned to discern where I need to make a stand.....using my voice to respond to treatment tha

Loving yourself means being brutally honest with yourself, and that is what this blog is about today, so fully......and the truth will set you free, no doubt, even if it leaves a scar in its wake, but that is the beauty of life, a tapestry of all the stories we have ever lived together, woven together with life lessons, and wisdom. And living a lie is an exhausting way to live.....maybe even more so, the one where you lie to yourself about it all.....and I know with such a qu

So Santa has been spinning in my story most of my life.....I loved the magic of what Santa brought as a kid.....aka Mom:) She was good at Christmas Magic, and my dad was down too to enjoy all of it too and play along, they both were so tuned into all of that..... and my grandparents would come on Christmas morning to watch us open our presents.....and that felt like magic.....it just so happened that it worked like that because my most of my parent's siblings lived other plac

I went to a Christmas party at my brother's house yesterday.....and it was a nice afternoon....it was nice to see everybody, and their families and the wonderful busyness that has taken over their lives......I miss my babies being babies in a way that is hard to articulate sometimes.....despite my enjoying each of our chapters so completely......And I was kind of the only one besides my other brother and his wife, in that category....with older kiddos.......and there were the

I have been way up in my feels recently in terms of gratitude.......sliding down the sunbeams of my life, and just wondering how did I GET TO live THIS life!!!!!! The contrast showing up starkly for me often, and remembering......and I think I have always been a great mother......embracing motherhood, with both arms, and going all in......my loyal Taurus shrouding my children in that loyalty and love.......but at the end of my marriage, I felt miserable.....really miserable i

I think this year has shown me, perhaps more than the rest, what is important.....it has been a year y'all lol:) I am guessing you might be feeling the same;-) And it occurred to me the other day all the places I have outgrown, so completely, and it has been on the wings of realizing that the things that live inside of me right now are not up for grabs......not even a little.....my authenticity.....my willingness to be me, and have people feel that.....that can irritate othe

I am a free spirit......in this chapter, so completely.....and I have never really understood what that meant......when I heard somebody use that term before, it conjured up imagery of a barefoot hippie dancing round at Woodstock......their eyes closed, and being in the moment ;-) But I now know that to be a FREE spirit.....your spirit really needs to be FREE.....in a literal sense.........and mine finally is......so fully.....and what it actually means is an unencumbered spi

I post about my kids often because they are my life....a giant part of my life is them, and they are one of the best parts of my life, no question.....this journey has been about a lot of things, but so much of that has had to do with them.....they are my heartbeat, and live deep within my soul.....and I have said it often, I know people are crazy about their kids, but there is a special quality that lives within the three of us, a magic that activates when it is just us.....

I tend to use humor to endure......if some serious stuff is going on, you will hear me crack a joke at some point....and the same was true as we left the ER Friday after my allergic reaction.....and my mom and daughter and I chuckled in the relief of the moment behind us;-)......but the imprint of that experience has remained over the last couple of days......particularly as I went to work yesterday.....realizing that I might not have seen my classroom again.....and feeling t

I have wondered if when a snake slithers along, and drops its skin on the ground, is it painful? Does it hurt them? I have seen this year described as "the year of the snake"...a year 9 about shedding our skin, and out with the old....in every way that can mean, to make room for a 1 year this next year.....a new start, quite literally....and while I see lots of things sometimes....that has resonated so deeply, and watching others around me I would have to say that that is tru

I went on a date yesterday! And I was proud of myself for saying yes, and getting myself out there, all things considered......and everything seemed to line up to lead me to that.....He lives a little under two hours away.....He drove here, and we met at Key Foods.....I took him to Hornbecks and Child's Park.....and we chatted and laughed pretty effortlessly.....having a level of comfort with one another that was surprising....not too many awkward moments cropping up, conside

Yesterday was a harrowing day for sure.....I have known that the fight or flight response lives within us.....and the freeze response, there were times at the end of my marriage where I felt frozen, quite literally, in the circumstance......but I have experienced it many times.....and sometimes it has been by way of something real......an emergency c-section......surgery......standing by my son's side in the NICU......my sister passing.....just so much of so much......but yes

Life is such a funny ride.....one that is a winding road......and as I have learned to let go and relax in this chapter, that surrender allows me to travel where I need to be.......or where I am led......and I am so fascinated by this latest twist.....I had written about my plan to speed date this Saturday.....finally pushing myself to get out there......I was pretty excited about it....just because of the interactive nature of it.....and because I am deeply tired of meeting

What makes a person trustworthy??.....I am not sure anymore.....I used to think it was actions aligned with words....and I was proven that even deception can live there too....or the amount of time you spend with a person, to see their actions stack up......and I find it strange with all I have been through in terms of lying and betrayal, that I am not fearful of trusting folks.....knowing now that my intuition has joined the party, and will alert me when things go sideways..

I recently was given a book to read that had been written about my former principal......he was a lovely man....a good human, deep into the crevices of his soul.....and in reading it I have been remembering him.....thinking of his time at my school......and I really liked him so much.......and was such a big fan, when I see his face in my mind's eye it is of him grinning......and in remembering him I remembered a student I had had all those years ago.....she was a great stude

We walk through this life with our "stuff" in tow.....my stuff is not the same as your stuff....but we most definitely ALL have our stuff.....and my "stuff" has been surrounding romantic relationships most of my life....and as I have been deep diving into my patterns and challenges surrounding that topic this past year.....digging into all of it even deeper, and realizing how deeply I have dove into all of it, as the year nearly wraps up, can you believe that?? Fastest year o

I wrote yesterday about realizing some more about how my energy has shifted, as I see people respond to my energy these days.....and energy is SO important.....it is in part how I live my life now.....FEELING my way through it all....both through people and in other ways....realizing that energy is really all there is.....the frequencies of our bodies dictating our health, and the frequencies around us dictating the quality of our life......and I suppose at one point in time

There is a wild piece of my life that has taken over....and it is likely only felt by me, maybe lol:)..... and I do not mean that I am wild in my behavior lol:) But there is a deep lack of "domestication" that I live in despite doing my domestic duties, if that makes sense.....I do those things for my children and myself....but I am still wildly free on any given day.....Making decisions about the how and when and if at all.....But there is a wildness that feels as if it has

I feel like the word "healing" is a buzz word these days....and as I got up this morning I was thinking that perhaps healing is needed more than ever in this world....and I certainly know a circle of healers in this area......and everybody is grinding and hustling and doing their thing....and trying to help other humans heal from the things that have wounded them! Changing the world one heart, one soul, one action at a time.......And I have written about my healing journey ev